Spam E-Mail I Acually Found To Be Lovely

You need not undo your collar. You will find me in my study. I’ll ask Jane. What year would it be? I’ll have some news for the boy.
It is so dark. It is really too funny. Try a pinch. Heaven bless her!In front sat Mrs. You need not undo your collar.
But we should go. There are two caves there ahead. Every day fewer good. Maria was lovely.

This email has been making its way around Hollywood circles the past 24hrs. Given the audience, I give it another 24 before it gets optioned as a Zac Efron vehicle.

————— Forwarded message ————-
From: [redacted]
Date: Mon, Mar 22, 2010 at 11:57 AM
Subject: [CAA-Alumni] Strange (But Serious) ISO: A Stand-In Boyfriend
To: CAA-Alumni@[redacted].com

Hello all,

A strange, but serious ISO. I work with an attorney who is in his early 60’s. He has a girlfriend who is in her early 20’s. I know, I know, but hey - we live in LA - it happens. 

The issue: The girlfriend’s parents don’t know about the older bf and they have been bugging her about her lack of a bf.
 
So, here’s what I need: a really good-looking and respectable-looking white guy in his mid-to-late 20’s who will be her stand-in boyfriend. No need to meet the parents in person. Just need the guy for about one day to go around to various locales around LA and take photos with the gf in various outfits, so that she can forward the photos to her parents and shut them up.

The individual will be paid for his time, but…as funny of a situation as this is…he must be dependable and he must be discreet. Really.

If you guys know of anyone whom you think might fit the bill, please have them e-mail me directly with their name, contact info and a recent photo

Thanks,

[redacted]